At 9 years old (4th grade) you’re not a big fan of school. It’s more the idea of school that troubles you than actual school. At the end of the day you’re always in good spirits, talk about your friends, and the things you enjoyed (music class, gym, recess, & lunch LOL). You’re also really understanding math so starting to enjoy that as well.
You’d rather being doing other things & don’t particularly see the point. Duh…you’re 9.
Anyways, there are incredible lessons in all of this.
- The actual event/task/etc is never as bad as your thoughts about the event/task/etc. You don’t like waking up early, the regimented 5 days/wk schedule and all the restrictions in place but once you get there you actually enjoy yourself. So, basically get out of your head (still working on this one myself).
- The dread & the feeling you get when going to school … never forgot that feeling. You will feel this feeling again in your life. Trust that feeling and MOVE ON whether it be a job, a partner, a friendship, etc. Obviously this isn’t apples to apples because you’re 9 and you don’t see the full picture and the importance of education. BUT, you do know yourself & your emotions. And you can trust yourself. Another BUT, you must balance the art of quitting with the art of sticking it out because it will get better. This is a VERY delicate balance.
The example I love to give you even now is Renny. When we first got Renny we were completely over-whelmed and over it. I wanted to quit and give him back so badly. I wanted my life back pre-puppy. And the puppy blues were so real and strong. But I knew it would get better, I knew I/we had to find the strength to get through. I’m so glad we did. He is one of the biggest blessings of our family. If we would have quit because it got uncomfortable we would have missed out on his incredible love and the reminder of our own strength.
Here’s the thing… It is a very delicate balance between the two (know when to quit & knowing when to “pull up your boot straps” but in actuality I think we know the difference & it’s quite simple. The little voice in our head (God) is always whispering the truth. Trust it.
This was hard for me because I was never taught to feel/accept my emotions let alone trust them. So when God would speak to me I would ignore it. I’ve spent the last decade learning to trust myself again and listening to that voice.
That feeling I told you never to forgot well I felt it at my first job and ignored and proceeded to stay there for 3.5 years. The damage that was done to my mental & emotional health took years to recover from. But I believe EVERYTHING is a blessing. That job highlighted areas within myself that need healing and it was the building blocks and credibility I needed to grow my career into something I really love.
Regardless of all of this, the best way to find your path, your joys, your purpose is to TRY EVERYTHING. Knowing what you don’t like is a beautiful & powerful thing. And the soul expresses and learns through experience. So always be grateful for the shitty job but don’t be afraid to quit.
I love you so much,
Abby
xoxo
PS after re-reading this I realize there is a lot of contradictions. Obviously this advice is circumstancial. Above all, trust yourself.
para Mia 